Wednesday, March 13, 2013

The 2013 Pope-mobile & other Pope merchandise

In my continued efforts to prove that I am serious about my desire to be the next Pope of the Catholic Church, I have taken up the task of creating a mock-up af what I think the next Pope-mobile should look like. But let's not make it such an exclusive item. In an effort to expand the reach of the Catholic Church and grow its membership numbers, I think that the new Pope (in this case, ME.) would be wise to create a line of officially licensed Pope-brand merchandise.

The cornerstone of this new Pope merchandise line would be the 2013 Pope-mobile.
Just look at this bitchin' machine. And it's available in five fashionable colors perfect for 2013 and beyond. The door lettering is customizable to your needs, if you were wondering.

But this bad bitch is just the beginning.

Imagine Pope-style trucker hats. Pope-style bath robes. Pope on a rope (yeah, it's a recycled joke) -- perfect for becoming closer to Jesus right there in your shower. Sure, you might feel some of that trusty Catholic guilt when that Pope-on-a-rope brushes across your naughty bits but you'll get over that with the mobile confessional unit which will be roaming the streets of your town every Saturday from 1-5 PM.

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