Sunday, March 16, 2008

I've never been that drunk

"I don't drink alcohol anymore after the time I pooped myself."

You just can't make up something as priceless as that quote. It's just something that comes out during an all-out Irish bash in a Minnesota town that seems to create reasons to party. What else is there to say?

Oh, sure, there were plenty of people drinking far more than they should have and there were plenty of folks wearing green who were "Irish for a day" (fakers) and there was the one girl who was leaning over the bar whose jeans needed a belt because who really shows off their thong anymore? I'm assuming that she may have heard us after we witnessed numerous futile attempts by "ill-fitting clothes girl" to stretch her shirt lower to make up for the coverage that her jeans lacked. Ladies, if your ass don't fit, don't stretch your shit...

What did you, fair readers, do to celebrate the observed St. Patrick's Day? Did you drink too much beer? Did you puke in a friend's shoes? Did you get permission first?

6 comments:

H said...

I didn't celebrate. No green beer, nothing. And there's no chance of me doing anything tomorrow, since it's Monday and I'm 95 years old and all (or at least act like it). I may wear green though, just to look a little festive.

Michelle Ann said...

I'm Hispanic...Cinco De Mayo is my limit in irresponsible holiday celebration. That being said, I am willing to be "Irish" for a great plate of Corned Beef and Cabbage

Jeff said...

I gave up puking in other people's shoes for Lent. But I could be persuaded to have a green beer. You buying?

Brooke said...

I forgot about it until this morning, so I guess I missed out!

VE said...

As long as the puke is green, then its ok...

cathouse teri said...

I drank my first green beer. I really didn't enjoy that. It tasted just like not green beer. But it bugged me. Someone bought me a beer and I drank it.

Have you ever watched Chris Titus' Show, "Norman Rockwell is Bleeding?" In it he tells how he quit drinking when he was seventeen. He fell into a bonfire. He calls it a one-step-program.