Thursday, December 06, 2007

More proud moments for Austin, MN

It's all over the news about the extremely rare nervous system disorders being reported by employees of Austin, MN's Quality Pork Processing plant -- an offshoot of Hormel Foods. In fact, the disorder is so rare, it is occuring there at a rate of over 100 times the regular occurance rate of the disease commonly known as CIDP.

But that's not why I'm writing this. Not even close. Austin, as I've recounted many times before, seems to almost thrive on making news in the "whaaaat?" portion of websites. There was the kid who got lodged inside the glass case of the claw game at Godfather's Pizza, there was the prostitution ring practically across the street from the county fairgrounds that serviced, on occasion, upwards of 100 johns in one night and of course the guy who was found dead literally hundreds of feet from my parents' own rural property.

Today's dumb news, though, is about the city's perpetually vacating mall. I have always thought it would make a killer indoor go-cart course but today's events prove that it might be better suited for full-size cars.

The likely silver haired driver who careened through an outer wall of the mall made, if nothing else, for a good photo op. The story related to the photo baffles me.

"Roughly 70 yards of tire tracks in the snow heading straight to the spot"

Straight. No swerving, skidding or sliding. Sure, there's snow on the ground and the maintenance of the parking lot leaves plenty to be desired but how can you drive over 200 feet and manage to end up well over half-way through a solid brick wall? Did granny have a heart attack? Did she think she was at a drive-thru pharmacy? Did she want her drivers license to be taken away?


Crabby said...

A drive thru mall. Maybe granny had an idea there.
Sorry, please tell me nobody got hurt before I continue to make an ass outa myself.
My SIL lives in Austin, btw.

Sornie said...

Nobody hurt except some shoes at Younkers shoe store.

justacoolcat said...

I have a lof of friends from Austin and I can safely say when it comes to that town all bets are off.

Sornie said...

Hey now, you are talking to a former (not very proud) Austin Packer here.

The Future Was Yesterday said...

"Did granny have a heart attack? Did she think she was at a drive-thru pharmacy?
Nah. Florida driver lost is all.

Sornie said...

Or as we call Florida drivers, old.