Monday, July 23, 2007

It was like Tetris but nowhere close

Thursday night, as we bought a few remaining things for our extended weekend excursion, we popped in to the local Target store because I needed a new pair of shorts (wouldn't a pair constitute TWO of something?) and I am cheap and we didn't have much time.

I decided that we should scope out the outdoor patio selection which should have been down to about 75% off clearance by that time. I was wrong. It had all been shuttled off to some bastion of clearance/seasonal goods that I don't know about and was replaced with row after row of school supplies.

I wandered around that back corner of the store for a minute or two and there it was, waiting on a cart as if it knew I was coming. I would venture to say that it equates to nirvana in a box.

I stared at the box, found the missus and drug her like a four-year-old through Toys-R-Us to the box perched on the cart and hugged the box. I promptly found an employee and asked about the box and he said he'd wheel it up to the front for me.

There we had it, two of most ass-kicking chairs I have ever seen that would look delicious on our patio. Finally we had something more than a gas grill and a charcoal smoker to "fill out" our patio with. I sized up the box and realized that the chair (unassembled) woudl have to be removed from the box to fit into my Grand Prix.

I pushed the seats ahead and with a Target team member watching, the old lady and myself began stuffing and shuffling things into the already filled car. It was something akin to a real-life version of Tetris but with large welded sections of wrought iron instead of images on a TV.

After about 15 long minutes, odd looks from every single customer who exited the store, a lady sitting five cars down the aisle we were parked in front of staring and snickering in amazement and the head shaking from the obviously amazed Target team member, we had the wrought iron chairs, cushions and small side table stowed away in the back seat and trunk. The only problem was that the driver's side seat wouldn't motor back far enough for me to drive so the ball and chain had to pilot the car on down the road.

The chairs look amazing and I'll even tack a picture on here so the jealousy of my 75% off find can ruffle everyone's feathers.

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