Monday, March 26, 2007

How to spoil a movie

There are just some places in the world today that you should refrain from acting up and making a scene. One place would be a nursing home; just because the Jell-O is runny and not solid doesn't mean that you have to act up and make a scene about it -- remember that the Jell-O isn't for the visitors of the nursing home, it's for the often toothless patients.

Another place would be at an elementary school choir concert. It's a given that the little kids aren't going to be on key. They are going to be a trainwreck but the parents expect this and are there to snap photos and shoot precious video of the kids. It isn't an "Evening at the Pops". Lower your expectations.

The last place you shouldn't act up and create a scene is at a crowded movie theater. Take, for example, our Saturday night at a certain mega-sized theater chain in the southwest metro. At a pivotal point during "Reign Over Me" a woman who should have stayed home with her boyfriend Tyrone and finished smoking their hash began chatting on her cell phone. Apparently the incessant texting just wasn't communicating well enough with Taisha.

Of course, this led to the person sitting directly next to the girl with the mentality of an eight year old standing up and pushing their way through the row of movie-goers so they could watch the movie which they had paid nine bucks to watch and walking calmly to the lower seats of the particular theater.

This action, however, just set the girl with the mentality of an eight year old in to a tizzy. She didn't take the hint and continued to text and talk which led to the guy sitting in the row directly ahead of her to tell her to be quiet followed by a round of movie-goers "shushing" the girl with the mentality of an eight year old. She did not take this well and proceeded to kick the chair of the guy who told her to be quiet a couple times.

I am amazed it didn't escalate any further. I am thinking that a friend of the girl with the mentality of an eight year old had the common sense to tell her little friend to grow the hell up and be respectful because this ended the disturbance. I have to wonder why she even went to the movie; if she was so intent of texting her friend and discussing the earth-shattering revelations revealed in the texting marathon she should have stayed home with Tyrone, smoked their hash and watched a few hours of the drivel on Disney Channel.

I am still angered because this caused me to miss about thirty seconds of the scene in the diner which was one of about five turning points in the movie which Rolling Stone reviewers ripped to shreds.

I apologize to all eight year olds. I know that even youngish elementary school students wouldn't act like this in a movie theater but how else would you describe an ignoramus like this one?

2 comments:

Hammer said...

If it's that bad I usually go get a manager. I may miss 5 min of the movie but at least the person will be told to shut up or get out.

Sornie said...

Oh, the thought crossed my mind but I had 18 bucks invested in this flick and some asshole suburbanite stoner wasn't going to cause me to throw away that kind of cash