Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Music of the mind

If you've been living under a rock, I have a newsflash for you. The spoiled and sex-crazed home movie (her acting skills are simply atrocious) starlet and hotel heiress Paris Hilton has gone and taken a turn from reality television into the music business.

The first single released to top forty radio is entitled 'Stars are Blind'. Before I go on, i have to get a few things off my chest.

I hate Paris Hilton. I hate her 'That's Hot' catchphrase. She is famous simply for being rich. That's how damn stupid Americans are. They will fawn over some vapid, expressionless twig because she's rich and not-so-famous. I hate 'The Simple Life'. I hate former heroin addict Nicole Richie. I hate that because they argued about something (probably shallow and pointless) that it gained the pair more fame and television time. I hate FOX television for giving these two bimbos a damned reality show (of course they gave a fat guy trying to fool a family during an engagement a show but I digress).

Now that I feel slightly less nauseous, I can go on.

Click that link above and download the track if you dare. As much as I loathe the Hilton name because of it association with eldest daughter Paris Hilton, I actually feel ashamed to admit that the song isn't half bad. It must have taken days, maybe weeks, of post-production audio airbrushing to make her already breathy and grating debutante voice even breathier but less debutantish. However, the song turned out alright.

While I doubt that she would ever tour (it would sound as bad as 'Smashmouth' singing without the help of a truckload of audio engineers), I doubt that Hilton will make much of a lasting impact on the already iffy music landscape. After all, it's minor blips on the radar screen like Paris Hilton that go on eventually to VH1 pop culture obscurity and that can be all but assured as I can almost guarantee that this reggae-tinged song won't be bringing home any gold records or topping Ryan Seacrest's weekly countdown.

Sornie OUT

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