Thursday, April 06, 2006

Now fear this

What in the world could possibly be worse than gays or illegal immigrants? How about an enormous influx of... gay illegal immigrants?

Imagine the uproar! Hordes of gay illegal immigrants flooding into the country, wearing neckerchiefs or sporting extremely butch haircuts. Wanting all the benefits that only naturalized citizens are due AND wanting to get hitched in some sort of freaky illegal alien gay civil commitment ceremony that is spoken in a foreign language that few, if any, can understand.

This is a problem that needs to be dealt with not when it happens, but BEFORE it happens. We cannot afford to risk our country's future by allowing gays to marry or illegal aliens to obtain guest worker status. Eventually they will wise up and marry, if nothing else, just for the green cards (which aren't even GREEN!).

Well, at least we wouldn't have to worry about offspring from the unholiest of unions... or would we?!?

They could adopt. They would adopt orphans from Guatemala, raise them to be gay and the cycle of marrying illegal aliens and converting them to homosexuality would continue in perpetuity.

Imagine the consequences.

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