Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Let's take back Christmas, to hell with 'Holidays'

I, for one, have no damn problem wishing anyone a hearty Merry Christmas. Hell, I have a five-foot tall Santa adorning my yard. That is about as merry as a guy can get.

What really pisses me off is the fact that, in an effort to offend nobody, so many have jumped on the bandwagon and begun wishing everyone they see -- both vocalizing it and saying it in print which turns my stomach every time I type-set it -- Happy Holidays.

While I will admit that there ae a multitude of holidays during the next month, the majority of Americans are christian and celebrate Christmas. I believe that while it is a religios holiday at the base, it is much more of a secular holiday -- especially in the last fifty years.

With a Santa in every mall, you can hear his jolly wish to every child the gin-soaked perv picks up -- Ho, Ho, Ho; Merry Christmas. It would be a damned travesty to hear the jolly bearded one pick up a child, jovially laugh 'Ho' three times and utter the phrase 'Happy Holidays'.

I believe that would make a toddler run away screaming, yelling that Santa is a God damned fraud. That would be exactly the thing to make a child lose his faith in Santa completely.

When did it all happen? When did the phrase 'Merry Christmas' become as unpopular as 'Heil Hitler'? How did our country become so utterly fucked that Christmas is seen as politically incorrect? Hell, retailers force Christmas on the unsuspecting citizens of America as soon as the first tree leaf turns yellow. When do we get to take back Christmas and tell all those wishing us 'Happy Holidays' to run to the local Kwik Trip store and buy a large bottle of 'Shut the Fuck Up?'

3 comments:

Tony said...

This past week on our show I did my 2-minute rant on THAT very topic.

Give me Merry Christmas or Happy Hanukah or Happy Ramadan. Stop with the Happy Holidays. I'll even take a good 'ole Super Solstice (or whatever the heck they wish for Winter Solstice).

I may do another rant in a future show on the same topic.

Cinthia said...

We're so taken up celebrating for the sake of celebrating, that we forget what we're celebrating in the first place.

paulsen said...

As far as I'm concerened Christmas is what I was raised on, and Christmas is what it will stay.