Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Our intercourse professionals aren't good enough for the Minnesota Vikings

Word has it that the Minnesota Vikings brought their news story broke one day during the daily police press conference that a man had been arrested after soliciting sex from a prostitute mere blocks from the downtown police station. He was an elderly gentleman and she was, hold on to your seat, only 15 years old. The hundred dollars exchanged hands while police watched and they followed to bust all parties involved a few minutes later at a sleazy roadside motel. This wasn't her first time working the business either.

I am guessing, had this girl not been placed in a juvenile treatment center, she would have been available for the 'Love Boat' cruise on Lake Minnetonka. I also am guessing that she knew others in the biz. They could have grabbed a couple van loads of midwestern grown, barely legal intercourse professionals and, in the words of everybody's favorite celebrity druggie Pat O'Brien, gone fuckin' crazy.

The Minnesota Vikings bring in gobs of money from Minnesota residents, give back to the community. Use local, homegrown intercourse professionals on the next sex cruise. And we all know that something like this will happen... it's only a matter of time.

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