Tuesday, July 13, 2004

Still out of touch

I left off with leaving early Sunday morning due to later commitments which were made far after this weekend was planned but with the whole compromise thing we split from the cabin to spend another day and a half in the stat's northern (relatively, anyhow) regions for mary to attend a manager's conference sponsored by the congolmerate for which she works. She was given one hundred dollars spending cash and a hotel room to stay in adjacent to the casino so it had some promise.

As I explored this non-existant town of 1,200 I soon realized why there was a casino here. They suck you in with the promise of loose slots and cheap hotle room but the literally isn't a damn thing to do in this so-called town. A town of 1,200. Remember that number. I would rather not revisit it.

I popped in back at the hotel/casino/entertainment megaplex around the designated check-in time on the handy itinerary she received. We got our room and got settled. Dinner wouldd be served at 5:30 so we relaxed and took a nape after driving three plus hours at a time too early for my tastes - especially on a Sunday. More particularly, too early for a vacation weekend.

I leeched $20 of her spending cash from her and ook the oh-so-swank elevator to the lobby where I could hear the dings and chings associated wiht casion action. I strolled around the casino, looking for a machine which would make me the millions I so desired. I soo just picked on at random. It was named Pharoah's Gold or Tigris Empire - something to do with both Egypt and money. Before I realized it, I was up a few bucks. I was actually winning. The northland was paying off. Before I got too greedy, I cashed out and headed back to the room.

The entertainment was coming up at 8:30 but my Spidey Senses told me it would be lame. At 8:45, my senses proved to be correct. A dance which approximately seven people attended. High drink prices plus being surrounded by total strangers makes for a rather awkward time.

We instead opted for a movie at the theater which I had discovered in my adventures earlier in the day. Yes, the town of - say it with me now - 1,200 has a six-screen movie theater. One of the screens was playing Anchorman.

We shelled out our money and strolled into the miniature stadium theater. I am used to a small theater holding 300 people maximum. This one, at the most, held 100 humans. The movie was an alright flick. Parts had me laughing hysterically but it didn't seem to live up to the hype surrounding it. The deluge of cameos was a great bonus and Jack Black, well Jack Black is ALWAYS great.

The next day left me with another opportunity for gambling fun in which I learned a valuable lesson I will forget next time I am in a casino. If you have lost half of your money already and succeed in nearly breaking even - quit. You aren't going to come out ahead. The natives just wanted it morre that day. Not much you can do when poised against the enire Mille Lacs Band of Ojibwe. We took their land many moons ago, now they ake the white man's cash. Stupid white men.

Many more fun times were had after leaving this scathingly small town but the details would bore even the most attentive three-year-old who has had too much sugar.

I feel out of touch for one reason. I haven't seen more than five minutes worth of news since last Wednesday night. Probably before then even. i am going on nearly a week without seeing Seinfeld or Letterman. I am out of touch with current events. I do know that the All-Star game is/was tonight. That's only because of ESPN.com.

I'll be back in touch tomorrow.

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