Friday, June 04, 2004

I'm so angry I could SPIT

In another obscure reference to modern television culture, this time I quote Jerry Stiller from The King of Queens. You may remember him as the angry father on that show as well as Frank Costanza on the sitcom that will live on longer then MASH - Seinfeld.

The reason behind my anger begins with where I live. It is essentially an island surrounded by road construction. My normal (non road contstruction obscurred) path has the absolute least amount of stop lights that one can encounter in a ten mile drive in these parts. The construction on one single block has slowed my route by approximately five minutes. Today that five minutes cost me actual money. I contemplated taking a route which I had taken a few weeks ago through a residential neighborhood which winds around a lake but struck on my almost normal course instead.

I sat at the never changing stoplight. I stopped at 4-way stop number one. I stopped at 4-way stop numero dos. I stopped at stop sign number three to rejoin my regular path. I waited for an opening and stepped on the gas. That's where it proved costly. I quickly reached the posted speed of 45 MPH and a couple extra clicks to keep pace with the traffic which surrounded me.

As I learned minutes later, the speed limit drops to 35 MPH as the road meanders across the narrows of the lake which I cross on a daily basis. That is when I was surrounded, as I said earlier, by cars to the front and back of me. I saw the police car sitting on a side street and slowed down due to the slowing traffic around me. I am also paranoid about cops in every possible way. They just make me nervous. It's instinct which you are born with. It's alot like the desire to eat - you are born with it. As I slowed along with the surrounding traffic, the squad car pulled out and in a few seconds flipped on his lights.

I knew already that I was getting a ticket. Every time I get pulled over - sometimes even as a passenger - I receive a ticket. Maybe I look like a bad seed. I think I look pretty clean cut and much like an upstanding member of society. No matter how I looked, that son of a bitch wrote me a ticket. A ticket to the tune of $115. Ass toupee.

Now I have to work even MORE overtime to pay for this latest encounter with the law. Oh, sure, I could take the time to go to court and plead innocent. Then having to go to court again only to be stuck with the same fine as I knew I was going to have to pay anyhow. It's a no win situation. Damn that ass toupee... sorry... public servant who protects us daily. Oh, HELL, they don't do anything except pull inncent drivers over. Where were they yesterday when an SUV full of imbred teenagers drove on the same street numerous times squealing their tires and yelling insults at people walking and biking while I enjoyed my round of disc golf within ear shot of these ass clowns. Where were the damn cops then, HUH?

Gotta run as I plan to work later than usual today. Damn the man - always holding a brother down. Damn, I thought you knew.

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